hurt

I use subtle ways to hurt myself that are accepted for grown-ups. It's hard to admit but sometimes I really like to feel like I'm abusing my body with too much coffee, cigarettes, drugs and by not eating. Maybe it's what I do when I need comfort because everything familiar feels good when you are really sad.

And still I'm so far away from being addicted to anything. One of my best qualities is probably that I get bored so fast that I can't do anything all the time.

It's better now. I. is helping me just being himself and in a really kind and silent way he is a lot like me. And it's good I feel better because it prooves that J isn't as stucked in my head as he was before.